tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-139070352009-11-05T15:59:25.659-08:00i am a dirty stinking liberal.garth2noreply@blogger.comBlogger550125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-78600678677751972832009-11-03T21:13:00.000-08:002009-11-03T22:01:44.927-08:00

Piping hot and steaming with joy and other fluids is this week's Hor-O-Skope! I consult the stars to give you insight into what's coming up for you throughout the week, or if you'll even survive to the next installment, which is unlikely, to be honest. Aries: As an daring, adventurous adventurer, you will soar to unknown heights and glean insight into the nature of the universe. As a careless

garth2noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-28708409609610026082009-11-02T14:36:00.000-08:002009-11-02T14:38:36.086-08:00

BoooooooooshBouncy Bouncyooo such a good timeBouncy BouncyShoes all in a lineBouncy BouncyEverybodysummersault,summersaultSummertimeEverybody sing alongBouncy Bouncyooo such a good timeBouncy BouncyWhite socks slipping downBouncy BouncyStilettos are a no noBouncy Bouncy oooBouncy Bouncy oooEverytime i bounce i feel i could touch the skyee

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-57820110014510313592009-10-29T16:37:00.000-07:002009-10-29T16:42:19.665-07:00

She loves this song: Happy Birthday RalphAtom and His PackageHair: Debatablealright, ralph...happy birthday...you freak...you're breakin' hearts and you're breakin' guitarstoday's your birthday and you don't even know how old you areyou're in love with every woman from tyleryou went swimming in the ocean with my goddamn dialeryou used to be fat, i think then i liked you best'cuz now you're skinny

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-16753731484952068352009-10-29T12:27:00.000-07:002009-10-29T16:43:36.225-07:00

God fucking dammit has another week flown by in my inexorable march towards death? It most certainly has. While I had a moment here in my daily ass-flattening routine I thought I'd send along your new Hor-O-Skope for the lulz. Cause motherfucker, I needs my lulz, and when I needs my lulz I gets my lulz. Aries: This week is one for you to express your masculinity. Try to fuck open a coconut.

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-45447747883395202832009-10-21T23:59:00.000-07:002009-10-22T00:07:53.406-07:00

I haven't pooted in a whileNick DrakeWhich WillPink MoonWhich will you go forWhich will you loveWhich will you choose fromFrom the stars aboveWhich will you answerWhich will you callWhich will you take forFor your one and allAnd tell me nowWhich will you love the best.Which do you dance forWhich makes you shineWhich will you choose nowIf you won't choose mineWhich will you hope forWhich can it

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-4296005158172857972009-10-21T10:26:00.000-07:002009-10-21T13:23:18.483-07:00

I recently realized that I have a tremendous gift...to read the futures of every single person in the world, in convenient 1/12th slices. So I decided that I'd offer my own horoscope...or Hor-O-Skope...to edify enlighten and otherwise embiggen the populace. Without further ado: Aries: Today is a good day for you to root around in an old couch. There could be something cool...a rare coin, or

garth2noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-55165395913292810092009-09-03T15:08:00.000-07:002009-09-03T15:09:44.763-07:00

Sun Kil MoonCarry Me OhioGhosts of the Great HighwaySorry thatI could never love you backI could never care enoughIn these last daysHer tears fellOn her pages found me outAbout her words I don't know whatTo do or sayWading throughWarm canals and pools, clear blueThe Tuscarawas flows intoThe Great LakeRiding backTo where the highway metDead-end tracksThe ground is now cement and glassToo far

garth2noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-56153305704045984372009-08-08T00:33:00.000-07:002009-08-08T00:35:15.457-07:00

I've got this shit set up to post as a note on facebook. All the internet settings and cross postings and shit make me want to throw myself into a giant blender and have my soon-to-be-liquid body set on fire. Anyways, I guess there's not any other things as promised by the title. Sunburn sucks.

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-22677953142893680172009-07-15T13:50:00.000-07:002009-07-15T14:03:24.360-07:00

What's with me? I post garbage on Facebook like an asshole. I post on stupid writing sites, I even fuckin' Twitter for some idiotic reason, what with Twitter being the World's Lamest Time-Suck of All Time. LT-SOAT is a hard title to get, since there's so very many internet-based lame-ass wastes of time, but Twitter is really a shining example of that classic past...uh...time. It's quite deserving

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-28770590265560914342009-06-12T11:50:00.000-07:002009-06-12T11:55:02.853-07:00

Rage Against the MachineWithout a FaceGot no card so I got no soullife is prison no parole no controljura got my number on a wire tap'cuz I jack for similac' fuck a cadilac surviveone motive no hopecuz every sidewalk I walk is like a tight ropeyes i know my deadline sire- when my life expiresso I'm sendin paper south under the barb wirethe mother of my child'll loose her mind at my graveit's my

garth2noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-84319493559813007942009-06-04T11:48:00.000-07:002009-06-04T11:52:07.917-07:00

This song is fun as fuck to play. The MisfitsWhere Eagles DareLegacy of BrutalityWe walk the streets at nightWe go where eagles dareThey pick up every movementThey pick up every loserWith jaded eyes and featuresYou think they really careI aint no goddamn son of a bitchYou better think about it babyI aint no goddamn son of a bitchYou better think about it baby, babeAn omelet of disease awaits your

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-25894760793684009172009-05-27T12:48:00.000-07:002009-05-27T12:52:10.140-07:00

I always thought this was a delightfully creepy song, for a mainstream rock band at least. play it at like half-speed in your head and tell me that isn't weird. Heartache TonightEaglesThe Long RunSomebodys gonna hurt someoneBefore the night is throughSomebodys gonna come undone.Theres nothin we can do.Everybody wants to touch somebodyIf it takes all night.Everybody wants to take a little chance,

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-8267315995728603162009-05-21T14:44:00.000-07:002009-05-21T14:52:54.075-07:00

yester-day was a giant pile of shit I got to live in. So no poot, and today is easy. This song has some of my favorite guitar noises evar. Modest MouseMake Everybody Happy/Mechanical BirdsThis Is a Long Drive For Someone With Nothing To Think AboutAnd I said you shouldn't make facts out of opinionsHe said that I was rightYou're right I knew that I wasAnd I'd hate to see anybody thank youBut I'd

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-51520387241577265872009-05-15T09:02:00.000-07:002009-05-15T09:04:30.476-07:00

Just in case anyone gives a sheeeit, I do have a god damned Twitter account, and I twit or twat or tweet or twut or twitch on it from time to time.

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-8018625963724702452009-05-13T16:20:00.000-07:002009-05-15T09:10:16.165-07:00

Didn't we put Nazis and Japanese to death for following orders/waterboarding/etc? Are we living in Bizarro world again? Obama, don't fucking fuck this up...it feels like you're going to fuck it up in Corrupt-o-Rama, the zany theme park W and Chick lived in. Please don't...Pictured: Not the bandThe Mountain GoatsNo ChildrenTalahasseeI hope that our few remaining friendsGive up on trying to save

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-8947203506871797682009-05-07T13:19:00.000-07:002009-05-07T13:22:28.419-07:00

Focus on the Family put up a poll asking people to join them for National Prayer Day (that we have that makes me upset). In any event, the results are hilarious:

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-77309442667051458412009-05-04T11:52:00.000-07:002009-05-04T11:54:26.250-07:00

Just for fun: "We live in a land where you can choose same-[race] marriage or [mixed-race] marriage," Prejean said. "And you know what, I think in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a [white person] and a [white person]. No offence to anybody out there, but that's how I was raised."The chick has a right to say whatever stupid shit she wants to.

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-69895491547386895442009-05-04T00:30:00.000-07:002009-05-04T00:33:07.174-07:00

Every single Marvel-based movie I've seen sucked. Spider-Man sucked. Spider-Man 2 sucked. The X-men movies have all been TERRIBLE. Iron Man was total garbage, worse so since so many jackoffs thought it was TEH GREETEST for some insane reason. I didn't see the "new" Hulk, but the first one was like cancer on the dick. Why on earth would I want to see this Wolverine origin movie when they have not

garth2noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-1300631166614710262009-04-30T10:16:00.001-07:002009-04-30T10:17:57.669-07:00

for some reason charles and I used to often do video chats, where we didn't even look at each other. this one time, i really looked closely at charles, and came to a surprising conclusion:

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-61343381489041830522009-04-29T14:03:00.001-07:002009-04-29T14:05:47.284-07:00

I actually make a post!To The Innocent had some of Rob Crow's most powerful songs on it, including this one, Plenty. It gives me the damn chills. ThingyTo The InnocentPlenty(Listen!)When it rains it rains plentyI think you need to walkI think you need to walk homeWe don't need to talkI think you need to walk homeSun shines on my skinRips my head right offIt's burning it's burning it's burning (

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-89540347882375062032009-04-13T23:48:00.001-07:002009-04-13T23:51:52.136-07:00

The "I know you're gay because..." commercials are only funny if they're, you know, clever, and not depressingly moronic. whatever two annoying teeny pop-culture kids you dragged up in front of the camera prior to the inevitable fading of their already dim stars may have done outside of this, your creative team managed to make them into clowns. Useless, lame, boring, unimaginative clowns. If

garth2noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-37777181444366879072009-04-10T12:40:00.001-07:002009-04-10T12:41:17.720-07:00

This guy's name has made me laugh for years.

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-19251894779050430062009-04-07T19:47:00.000-07:002009-04-07T19:49:39.741-07:00

does anyone honestly believe that the last boom wasn't primarily driven by fraud? from little frauds originating with homeowners, agents, appraisers, and inspectors, to big frauds perpetrated by guys like Madoff et al, then the REALLY big frauds thrown down by AIG, Lehman, etc.? Do you really believe this whole thing wasn't a fucking lie? Cuz it sure looks like a lie, and it sure looks like us

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-44887192963880060182009-04-07T12:48:00.000-07:002009-04-07T12:49:08.183-07:00

garth2noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13907035.post-29796620202257783142009-04-03T21:15:00.000-07:002009-04-03T21:16:33.116-07:00

On 11% stout. With a pirate flag on it. On an empty stomach. Oh my.

garth2noreply@blogger.com0